I’m scared. I did something that my head told me not to. I don’t know what to do. It feels wrong and I don’t know what to do. It wasn’t anything bad, but I went against what I had put in place. I don’t even know if this makes sense. I shouldn’t have done that. I like that I went against my thoughts, but it hurts….
People who suffer from OCD get “stuck” when these thoughts, feelings, or urges come to mind. Instead of properly filtering the stimuli out, they become hyper-focused on them. They feel that the thought must mean something, and they can spend hours upon hours trying to solve the perceived problem or eliminate their anxiety. Unfortunately, the more they focus on these thoughts, the more real they seem. You have a "danger system" in your brain, an alarm that should go off when you are in real danger. When you have OCD the alarm goes off even when you are not in real danger, and you do compulsions to feel better. This gives you temporary relief from anxiety, inadvertently teaching your brain that there really was a danger in the first place, even though there wasn’t. This makes the alarm go off again and again when intrusive thoughts, feelings, and urges arise. So it is good that you do not "undo" the thought by engaging in a ritual- perhaps in your case this might be returning the item and purchasing the other one- resist the urge to do this. You can tolerate the anxiety and it will pass- you don't need to "do" anything to have it pass.
Yeah…. I struggle with this a lot. Thank you for explaining this a bit more, it feels good knowing more. Sometimes I focus so much on one thing that if becomes real. I know it isn’t though and I’m going to continue to try and challenge my thoughts as much as I can. I hope anyone struggling found some help in these situations, because I definitely did :)
Sorry you're feeling anxious. But this is awesome! You went against a trivial/silly (by your admission) "rule" your mind put in place that served no real purpose. You pushed back against the way your mind works. That seems good to me in this instance! Step back and look at your world now - what has changed or what negative consequences have developed because of this? It sounds like the only thing is it made you anxious. OK no problem - you can learn to tolerate that anxiety and get rid of it over time. Don't give in to any compulsions to alleviate anxiety, simply tolerate it. You can do it!
Thankyou so much for you’re encouraging words. Everything you said makes sense and I’m going to try and believe and challenge myself more. I’m feeling a lot better about it now, especially after sharing my thoughts. It does feel a little better knowing that I pushed against one of my ‘rules’… It’s very hard sometimes, but knowing I have support means so much😊😊😊😊
what do you do?
It’s so dumb… It makes me sound weird. I bought something on an app, but I originally thought of buying something else. My mind was set on this original thing, so when I didn’t buy it first, it freaked me out. I’m not very good at change. I’m sorry, this probably makes no sense
@lovelybook04 it’s ok, you don’t do something bad
I think I commited the worst sin. I had no bad intentions but then I realized I might have thought something bad. I'm so scared and I don't know if I'm forgiven. I'm trying not to replay what happened in my head but it's so hard and I'm so scared.
Hey y'all - I did something unintentionally, and now I'm really scared that I broke a boundary in my relationship. I have heard the logic for both sides of the argument, and while I don't believe I broke a boundary (when I'm somewhat calm) - I'm still plagued with doubt and fear, and it's making me believe that I did indeed do something wrong. Is this real event ocd? Did I actually do something wrong? I don't know what to do.
I gave into a POCD intrusive thought. Nothing came of it, but it was wrong. I feel really guilty and am terrified to tell my therapist but I feel like I should because of the guilt. I hate this so much.
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