Changing my plans for my OCD

Hello. I have been on here for a while but this is my first post. I'll cut to the point. I've always wanted kids. And now that my husband and I are trying for a kid.. I'm so nervous about it. I have a hard time touching doors and foreign objects because of germs as it is. And i'm worried all pregnancy is going to do is increase my anxiety. The fear is so intense that tonight I told my husband maybe I don't want kids?.. I do. But I don't know if I can put myself through hormone changes like that when I feel like I can't even control my anxiety most days nows. I've felt like this for 3 years....

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 40w ago

I think it's good that you're thinking of how having kids can impact you. It's a huge decision. You can always put having kids on hold until you're doing well with OCD and anxiety recovery. :) Raising children is really difficult, even without the challenges presented by mental health.

Username: nangel117nangel117

Date posted: 40w ago

I just worry I'm never going to feel ok and ready for it. And I also worry my husband's going to leave me because of it.

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 40w ago

@nangel117 🫂 I understand. I have put off having children even though I really want them until my mental health is improved. Hopefully your husband won't leave you because he's with you for you, not for your baby-making capabilities, but you can't control what he does. Worrying about things doesn't change them. (Not that that always makes it much easier.) If you're never ready then I think that's okay. I'm also coming to terms with that being a possibility for me. It's really hard when all you want is to raise a child, but there are other ways to be happy in life, and even help kids or be around them without having your own. Personally I don't think there's a reason why you wouldn't be able to someday though. OCD is highly treatable. You just have to go through the treatment. :) If you're worried about the hormones of pregnancy affecting you, there are ways to have biological children without having to go through pregnancy, and there are many, many children who are already alive who need homes. You have options and a lot of time. ❤️

Username: nangel117nangel117

Date posted: 40w ago

@Anonymous Thank you for these reassuring words. I do hope with time that I can improve enough to feel comfortable with having kids. I just don't want to bite off more than I can chew especially when it comes to my mental health. I want to be present and healthy for my children. Whether I have my own or I adopt. I wish you the best in your journey to having kids as well.

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 40w ago

@nangel117 Thanks so much. :) For what it's worth I think you're making a healthy decision for yourself and your potential future kids too. Be well!

Username: ZeldaKorr32ZeldaKorr32

Date posted: 40w ago

hey there, i can only imagine how tough it must be feeling this way, especially when it's about something as significant as starting a family. it's really brave of you to share this, and you're definitely not alone in these feelings. 🌟 i'm actually battling a different ocd theme myself, so i might not relate directly to your situation, but i've found some apps that could be helpful. there's this one called "unstuck ocd therapy tools" that my local ocd support group recommended. it's pretty cool because it gives you ai-personalized guidance and exercises right when you need them. then there's "gg ocd," which is a bit different because it focuses on teaching you about cbt through small learning modules. it's great for getting a handle on the basics of cbt for ocd, though it's not as tailored to the moment as unstuck is. both apps have been lifelines for me in different ways, and i hope they can offer you some comfort and tools to manage your anxiety, especially now. remember, it's okay to seek help and take things one step at a time. you got this. 💪

Username: hereintheUK

Date posted: 2y ago

Parents and mums to be…….

Hi everyone I’m new here. I’ve been to hell and back in the last 5 months with my OCD which has affected me with various themes in various ways for since childhood but I’ve only this year discovered I have OCD. I have been suicidal 3 times and very close to ending it all. I have a question for all the parents out there/mums to be suffering with OCD…… I already have a 9 yr old boy and 8 yr old girl and have just found out I’m pregnant again…… I really want to be happy about it but my OCD is determined to make me terrified of having another baby and I am living in fear and dread of changing nappies etc as I know it will start affecting me with POCD type thoughts. I didn’t have OCD anything like as bad as it has been this year when I had my two eldest so never had any issues when they were babies. But I don’t even know how to feel except I am terrified now and very seriously considering abortion just to not go through what the OCD may do to me mentally! Though it would devastate my partner. I have had minimal therapy so far since August but no ERP therapy, I’ve lost faith in therapists as I’m yet to meet one that actually knows what OCD is like for those of us living with it. Is anyone else currently facing this situation with being pregnant or been through/currently going through it? How are you coping? Please don’t give too many details as I am scared of being triggered

Username: kanyewestlov...

Date posted: 1y ago

should i still have kids?

i haven’t been diagnosed w/ ocd but my therapist says i have like symptoms of it but i recently just stared dealing w/ Pocd (hell) that my therapist says was triggered from the sound of freedom which absolutely breaks my heart bc i was so excited to support the movie but now i feel like it’s one of my biggest regrets. i feel as if i would’ve never watched the movie i would’ve possibly never started dealing w/ this. But my biggest scare now w/ this is having my own kids . i’m F18 and throughout my whole teenhood my biggest goal and dream was to become a mother a GOOD mother. everything i tried doing was motivated by the thoughts of giving my kids the absolute best one day. Now i feel like it’s my biggest fear w/ dealing w/ this and i don’t know how i’d even explain to someone like my bf for example, of the reason why i don’t want to have kids anymore ( though i still really do but i just literally feel like can’t because of this 💔💔) are there any mothers out there w/ Pocd w/ kids out here? how do you cope w/ this? should i even have kids?? i also feel as if it kinda bad rn. i was doing good for a couple weeks and last night it just rushed back for no reason. i’ve learned what groinal responses are ( it absolutely scared the shit out of me before i found out what it was and i was just not okay and sort still am not when it happens. it just feel too real and i end up sobbing god i hate this ) and i feel as if i’m constantly body checking myself especially when i see a cute baby or children tiktok i love babies n kids id never wanna hurt them in such away i rather pass away. i just can’t believe why this this happening i used to be so much more happier before this and i really don’t know how to deal w/ this and what i should do😖💔💔

Username: Chairo

Date posted: 44w ago

OCD and Pregnancy

Hi! I have OCD and am thinking about starting a family. I have been married for a few years (through some pretty sever ROCD) and starting a family has come up more than once. Every time our “this is when we will start” time comes around I have a HUGE spike in OCD including ROCD and OCD around having sex with my husband. I have a history of sexual assault, but that’s another story. ANYWAY…I was wondering if there are any folks on here with OCD and thinking of having children, pregnant, or went through it all with OCD. Really just looking for community and any resources that might have helped you- books etc. I am in therapy and on medication so really looking for anything supplementary. Thanks for reading!

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