Existential OCD and fear of aging

@mandiocd Idk… can we message on here?

@sophielove How long have you had this theme?

@mandiocd About 3-4 months I believe

@Someone99 Thank you. I really appreciate your comment. It’s hard for me to believe but I am desperate to find faith.

@sophielove Can you tell me a little bit more about your faith? Have you ever been involved in a church? Etc.

@Someone99 Yes of course! I was baptized as a Catholic, ( my mother’s religion), and my father is an Orthodox Christian. I had a friend that was Greek, and I went to that Church a little bit to learn about the culture and the language, but it wasn’t a regular thing. I talked to a priest recently, but he didn’t really give me the reassurance I needed. I am interested in attending church, but a part of me feels like religion is a “ coping mechanism.” I know this may sound a little silly, but some people have good arguments. I really do think that there is a higher power though, and I am trying to not let that get to me. A huge part of the OCD is the constant research- whether it’s at school or home, a lot of the time I am searching for answers. I keep finding myself scrolling on quora or Reddit, and a lot of people are saying that there is no point of life but to “ live it”, but I can’t help myself but feel like there needs to be more than that. Even happy things feel sad now. I am scared to age, and scared to not be able. What if heaven is boring, and all my memories are erased. I’m so sorry, this was a lot, but I am really struggling and I hope that you can understand that!!!!!

@sophielove Thank you for sharing! Please don't apologize for writing too much!!! I became a Christian at 27 years old, although my family attended church occasionally as I grew up. It's like I learnef the stories, but it wasn't until at age 27 it became real. It was actually like God was pursuing me at that time. Then many years later, in 2018, I had a real event OCD crisis that actually had me in the hospital for a week, unresponsive, just ruminating. After that my religion, or relationship with God, did become a compulsion. I responded to my faith in extremes, one compulsion after another. So I get that! And it's a valid concern. I then began ERP therapy in 2023. In time I became "sober" as my OCD crisis eased and I was successfully applying response tools. That's when faith, my relationship with God became real again.

@Someone99 I really do appreciate your response. Based on your experience, how do you stay motivated in your current life right now? Is there a “ point of life”?

@sophielove I like how we're having 2 conversations at once. 🙂 There is a point of life. It's different and unique for everyone, but absolutely real. Coming to know Jesus in a relationship brings that in to focus, it will for you. However, I do think it's important that you are certain your spiritual search isn't a compulsion. I want it to be real for you as it is for me. It's amazing. As we age and become more responsible, especially with marriage, kids, etc, they certainly become a reason to live, and motivation. But being in a relationship with God, there's more. There's purpose in every moment. It's amazing

@sophielove We are created by a Creator. It's completely natural to want to know our Creator. We all have a void only God can fill. 🙂

@sophielove My younger son has been going through similar challenges recently.

@Someone99 Thank you so much you have no idea how much that helped

@Someone99 Do you think that we remember our lives and those we love in the afterlife?

@sophielove I want to be careful in answering because are you seeking reassurance? Maybe, maybe not. Otherwise, it's a good question. Yes, I do believe we will actually be reunited with loved ones. Do you have a Bible?

@Someone99 I am seeking reassurance yes, I am also seeking for some truth. I do not have a bible, I am interested in getting one, the only thing is some parts of the Bible seem to have contradictions with science etc.

@sophielove All contradictions are theory at best, and a distraction. The Bible is the word of God, as if God wrote a letter to us. It's the same yesterday as it will be tomorrow, so when we seek God and or God's voice, we know we have it in writing. God is Truth. God's word is Truth.

@sophielove And why I believe we will be reunited with loved ones is because the Bible says so. 🙂

@Someone99 Thank you so much! Since we will remember our loved ones though- will we remember the memories we had with them? I’m scared to get old and then my life will be over and all of my memories will be erased.

@sophielove Will download a Bible app? Search on play store or apple store, whichever you have, for a NASB version, it's easy to read and remains close to original text. I have an answer for you, but I want you to read for yourself as well. 🙂

@Someone99 I do have a bible verse app- what is your answer based on your own views?

@sophielove Based on what I've learned about the character of God, some verses in the Bible, and other things (not Reddit! Lol). I believe that we will absolutely know our loved ones, we will have all the memories that came from love, faith, and hope (not bad memories, because we have those too), and more that we can't comprehend in this life.

@Someone99 The main reason I was asking this is because of this verse: “For behold, I create new heavens and a new earth; And the former things will not be remembered or come to mind.” I guess I kind of interpreted that as that we wouldn’t remember , however some say that it may be only our past troubles? I feel like we should remember some stuff from Earth though to realize how great heaven is…?

@sophielove I love how you're seeking answers. Scripture is vast and sometimes the answers aren't crystal clear. God gives us enough, and leaves plenty of room for faith. In 1 Corinthians 13, Paul writes about gifts passing and mentions "when the perfect comes..." which is Jesus, restoration, the new heaven and earth... The chapter ends with the 3 things that remain: faith, hope, and love. The greatest being love. So yes, everything we experience here on earth stemming from faith, hope and love will be with us always. All out years will be wiped away, etc. The Bible is loaded with promises. And yes, promises from God. It's impossible for God to lie, and He won't change his mind. 🙂

@sophielove All our tears will be wiped away...(silly autocorrect! Lol)

@sophielove This conversation with you is a blessing to me!!! And I look forward to it continuing. Thank you. 💜

@Someone99 Thank you! I love how strong your faith is and I hope I can reach that too one day!!!!!🙏

@sophielove I wish my faith was strong, sometimes not so much. What would you think about finding a good church to help your faith grow?

@Someone99 That sounds good! I have a beautiful church right near me!!!!!

@sophielove That's great! As long as it's a church that teaches the biblical correctly. 🙂 You should go and get involved. It's a life long journey building your faith. It sure is for me. Some of the most difficult moments in life are the most faith building, even though we don't want those difficult moments, there can be purpose in them.

@Someone99 Yes I keep asking my parents to attend! I may go to the weekly dinner or something like that. I suppose you do have a point though- our difficulties can help us grow our faith and become closer to god!:)

@sophielove I can't tell you what a blessing my church is and has been to me and my family. I've been going to the same church and had the same pastor for 28 years. My pastor visited us in the hospital when both boys were born 26 and 22 years ago, and also stayed by my side in the hospital earlier this year as my dad passed away. Being part of a good church adds so much to life and will grow your faith. People are so afraid to get close to each other these days, but there's so many blessings in giving, helping others, etc. Life isn't about what we get...it's about what we give. You mention your parents, may I ask your age?

@Someone99 That is very encouraging to hear. A priest was also with my grandma when she died. Earlier she actually had a significantly bad blood clot, then they put holy water on it and it was gone. The doctors had no medical or scientific explanation for this. It caused her to live an extra 20 ish years. I am a teenager about to be 14.

@sophielove God is good, and works in mysterious ways!!! You're actually very wise for your young age!!! My name is Mike, btw. I assume you're Sophie. :-) I'll always encourage you to seek a personal relationship with God. I was a little bit of a trouble maker in my teen years. I look back on that time in my life and think about how amazing it would have been to be seeking God and living for God in those years. But then again, all that was part of what brought me to seek God. My boys have a personal faith and grew up to be amazing young men, they both serve in music ministry leading worship, etc.

@Someone99 Thank you very much for all of these quick responses! I am very passionate about getting a relationship with god. Yesterday at my basketball game I felt so much more like myself. I have gone on kind of an anti- anxiety pill and I feel like it has been helping with my depression. However, I do think that god is playing a huge role. You also did really help me. Knowing someone older is this encouraging about getting into faith really inspires me. At my game I was playing so much more like myself and I had so much more energy. I think this may be God’s way of bringing me closer to him. Very encouraging to hear also that your boys turned out well and had strong faith. I am very into music also as I play the piano!!!!!🫶

@sophielove It's so cool that you play piano!!! I'd love to hear you play sometime! 🙂 My son plays keyboard and sings for the church most Sundays and his wife sings occasionally. My younger son plays guitar at our small church in Pennsylvania.

@Someone99 Sorry to change the topic. A kid slightly older than me passed away a little while ago. I just went to a memorial and it seemed to trigger all of these thoughts again. That is amazing that your son is that invested in music by the way!!!!!

@sophielove I'm so sorry you lost someone, was he a friend, someone in your school? Be comforted in knowing God is always there. Here's a couple favorites of mine in times like this: Psalm 34:17-18: The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears And rescues them from all their troubles. 18 The Lord is near to the brokenhearted And saves those who are crushed in spirit Psalm 116:1-2: I love the Lord, because He hears My voice and my pleas. 2 Because He has inclined His ear to me, Therefore I will call upon Him as long as I live.

@Someone99 ❤️🙏 Yes. He was a grade above me, and went on my bus. I am scared to die but can’t live. I don’t want to be old and not able but I want to live a long life. I feel as if I do not know what I want anymore. I just feel SO lost. 😞

@sophielove You're not lost, because you're not alone. I'm here for you. One day at a time. Ok?

@sophielove I heard you when you told me you noticed something different, something amazing, like you were yourself again for a moment. That was real.

@Someone99 Yes but it doesn’t last long. Just small moments of my old self.

@sophielove Not your "old self". The person you really are. I know what you're going through, been there myself. What time is it where you are?

@sophielove Hey there. How have you been?

@Someone99 I’ve still been struggling. Questioning my friendships and goals now. Really losing hope I’m going to be honest. It’s 5:57 here right now by the way!!!!!🙂

@sophielove PM? Lol. Looks like we're on the same time zone! I'm trying to think... You said 5:57 and it says an hour ago, and I'm sending this at 7:09pm... 🤔

@sophielove I know there can be times when hope seems lost, but at your age, these times are temporary. I'd be glad to help you through anything I can. :-)

@sophielove I did enjoy your piano video! Hope that's ok. :-)

@Someone99 Yes!🙌 Today even at basketball I was having fun and talking to my friend. Then all of a sudden I was like “ this is not going to last forever” “ I won’t be able to play sports forever”

@sophielove 🙂 I like how you're a deep thinker. It may seem like a curse sometimes, but is a gift. And as time passes and situations change, new opportunities begin. I know it seems scary, I remember going through that as well at your age.

@Someone99 Thank you. I guess I get really carried away with my thoughts. I even question what’s the point of talents or gifts if they won’t last forever. I hate these thoughts I really do. I am scared of the future so terrified. If nobody created god how is he, “him”? Why do we think that the universe didn’t crate itself, or did it? I’m so sorry for all of these hard and repetitive question I feel like a burden right now!

@sophielove Not a burden at all! I really look forward to hearing from you, so please don't feel like you can't write me. I'll always respond as soon as I can. :-) It's ok to question these things and to seek answers, but it's not healthy to bottle it inside. So I'm thankful to be someone you can write to!!! As far as the creation of the universe, there's a lot of information based on theory, science, perceived "facts" but in reality, that's all we'll have because no one was there. In the Bible God is called the Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end, it teaches God exists outside the confinement of time as we know it. Eternal is never ending, nor beginning. We can't comprehend things like this because all we know is time. I love how the Bible begins "In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth..." One thing I've learned being a believer for 27 years, God loves 2 things most from us, faith and worship. Maybe God is looking for those from you?

@Someone99 Maybe. I really want to have faith. I’ve been struggling for so long now. It’s hard for me to even hang out with friends and play soccer because I feel like my goals and relationships are meaningless. I’m hoping that maybe if god is real then there will be meaning- this leads me to thinking that maybe god is just an excuse for people to move on with their lives. I think I said that before. If there is one I could ever want is to find true happiness again. I am terrified of the future I hate that. I wish things could go back to normal again. I’ll never ever be the same:(

@sophielove Friends I’ve talked to say that there is darkness and all of that. How do they live? How do they love? How do they live purposefully? Sometimes I just feel like it would be better not existing. It doesn’t make sense though because I don’t want to die. I feel crazy but, I could die at any second. There is so many illnesses in this world and terror. I am just living my life and there is a clock of the time I have left, but I don’t know how much time is remaining on it. Not knowing everything and all of the answers scare me. How do I escape this? I am so scared to age! Please help🙏

@sophielove You have an incredibly realistic view of life. I'm amazed at how intellectual, and deep you are at 14 years old. This is a gift. I want to handle our conversation with care, like you're my own child. (Hope that doesn't sound weird!) There is darkness, illness, death in this world. It's real. But so is God. Success, fame, fortune, all that is empty without God. God is love. We can't reach God or find God. God reached down to us in His son Jesus. All you seek, I experience every day because I walk with Jesus. I know Jesus personally, and it's all you seek. You can have that personal relationship too, and find purpose, God's purpose for your life.

@sophielove I'm praying for you, Sophie. Thank you for sharing all this with me. 🙏🏼🩵

@sophielove Wise, that's how I'd describe you. You're very wise for your age. :-) I hope my response wasn't too long or too much. We can take this one step at a time. I look forward to hearing from you again.

@Someone99 Thank you. I pray every night that I can, I try to pray even more. I still don’t know how to gain that personal connection with God. I am scared to not be this age forever get old and realize I won’t exist. How can I get that deeper relationship with God? I’ve been trying for so long. It would make sense for there to be a creator. I know that deep down. And I thank you for all that you said. It does help. I am very interested in religion. And want to become a better person through God.

@sophielove One thing I'm excited for you to discover is the difference between "happiness" and "joy". Happiness is something we seek based on comfort, like "I'll be happy if I had a new car". Things like that are nice, but a relationship with God is so much more. The Bible talks about joy, and even "fullness of joy". In my experience, in life's most difficult moments, like the loss of a loved one, though it's very difficult, God has given me "fullness of joy" in those moments, because of a relationship with Jesus. Religion is what we do, relationship is based on what He did for us. Can I ask you things about what you've learned about what the Bible says?

@sophielove Also, here's a 15 minute video to watch: https://youtu.be/IOU3eXirn_c?feature=shared

@Someone99 Thank you! I will definitely watch that video. I learned that our past troubles will be forgotten, I learned that we will live eternally in heaven, and I learned a lot of other things.

@sophielove What do you know about Jesus?

@Someone99 I know that he got crucified, I know about the king of thorns, I know that he came back to life and is supposedly coming back someday. I know he has prophecies too.

@sophielove Crown of thorns*

@Someone99 This is going to sound random, but have you heard about the Project Blue Beam conspiracy theory? What do you think about it? Does the Bible mention anything regarding that topic? I saw it mentioned by this religious guy on YouTube

@sophielove No I haven't. I'll look in to it though.

@sophielove I just read a little bit about it on Wikipedia. Interesting. The world has been attempting to erase Abraham religion since the beginning of time. It used to mean something to say "the Bible says..." now it's gotten to the point people say it's all made up. It's all distraction from the truth.

@sophielove What do you know about the thing known as sin?

@Someone99 I know that it can be forgiven as Jesus died for our sins on the cross. But some sins are not forgivable like death I think…

@sophielove Awesome answers. :-) Death certainly is not a sin, actually the result of sin. At creation, the garden with Adam and Eve, death was never in the picture. However, the serpent came in and deceived them to disobey God, eat of the fruit of the tree... That's when death entered in because of separation from God. So, we are born separated from God. That's one thing I'd like you to consider and discuss before we move on. Please ponder this and ask any questions you come up with.

@Someone99 Oh I worded it wrong! So sorry I meant murder and Blasphemy. What seems like a reasonable question to me is the idea of Adam and Eve, vs the scientific idea of evolution. How do those compare and is it possible that both could be true, or is Adam and Eve more metaphorical?

@sophielove More recent studies of DNA are disproving evolution. It takes more faith to believe in evolution than creation. Changes within species based on environment, diet, culture, etc are possible, but change in species is being proven to be impossible, by science. God created us in His image. We are separated from God by sin, or sinfulness. Maybe this is explains our desire to discover God? Something that should be there, but isn't, and it causes unrest?

@Someone99 https://youtu.be/2GfKZlTRNjA?si=s0n2xrVIvHmXGvsn I totally agree with you, however a lot of these kind of videos say otherwise, this makes me rethink the whole idea of religion and everything. You do have a point though.

@sophielove Keep in mind, that's theory, and 6 years old. Also, the researchers in this type of research begin with the motive to prove their point, not neutral, they're mind is made up. Do a search on "DNA proves evolution is impossible" and you'll see lots of stuff from reliable sources. Thing is, sooner or later, it comes down to faith.

@sophielove Can I give you a homework assignment? Lol. Read Genesis chapter 1 & 2. The other hoax scientists push is the "big bang" theory. Genesis says God "said let there be"... So God spoke creation in to existence and set it in motion. I don't know about you, but if God would speak, it would be very loud!!! Maybe that's the "noise" they say they can hear that proves the "big bang"? Hmmmm

@sophielove Again, no one was there to witness the creation of the universe so again, it comes down to... faith.

@sophielove And I'm not looking to develop your confidence in religion. We'll get to that eventually. You continue to amaze me how wise you are. :-)

@sophielove Meaning, I'm hoping you'll understand what a relationship with God is, then you'll have confidence in religion. Religion is what we do, relationship is why we do what we do. It's so much more.

@Someone99 Thank you! Wow, this really helped. Slightly off topic do u mind if I ask if life really does go by fast? I’m super scared to get old and not be able to do the things I can now. I feel like it’s really sad.

@sophielove It does but it doesn't. Lol. Meaning, there are periods in life that seem to last a long time. I noticed that when our kids were born. The first couple years seemed to last forever because of the sleepless nights, the excitement and new challenges of a baby, etc. Then when they were graduating high school it was like, wait, where did 18 years go!?!? I was at my Dad's bed side when he passed away this past May. It was somewhere I never wanted to be, but I wouldn't have wanted to be any where else. I remember him being the age I am now and it didn't seem that long ago. But I know heaven is my home. And knowing that helps me make the most of today. Someone once said "it's not about the amount of years to your life, it's about the amount of life in the years you have that matter." Something like that. Lol.

@sophielove Not sure if that answers your question. 🤭

@Someone99 No it answered it well! Do you think there will be like fun stuff in heaven and if we’ll remember our life and if we will keep our unique talents and play sports?

@sophielove 🙂 I really like how thoughtful you are! I've been trying to imagine as I'm getting older, that heaven is more real than what we know here. I used to understand it as like a spirit thing where we're like Casper the friendly ghost. But I believe we're going to have physical bodies, we'll eat, do things, have a purpose, work but it won't seem like work and all the negative things will be gone. No more pain, loneliness, hurt, heartache, anger, etc., and no time, no end... eternity. That's where you can find comfort, my dear friend.

@Someone99 I’ve been watching this documentary. It gave me some hope. I know that we aren’t supposed to go to mediums, but don’t you think it’s weird how they know so much?

@sophielove A bit off topic…

@Someone99 Happy Thx Giving by the way:)🫶

Thank you, and Happy Thanksgiving to you as well! I know how you feel. I mentioned my Dad passing away back in May, I'm a lot like him, everyone always commented on how obvious it was. He had a lot of anger and racial prejudice, so I didn't necessarily want to be like him, and can say I don't have those issues. They call it "generational curse". But it can be broken, we don't have to be like them, the negative things, so be encouraged by that. The negative you see in him you can use to grow as who you are.

And you touch my heart. My boys and I always have deep, thoughtful conversations, and I feel that with you in this format, and it's a blessing to me. I imagine if I had a daughter I'd be able to have deep meaningful conversation with her as well. 💙 I know you'll find purpose as you continue to seek God and the truth. God made you, designed you as the unique person you are, for purpose. God knows and will guide you in your purpose. And God's promises are to our loved ones as well. Thank you for being here and talking with me. I'll always be here for you, You're a blessing to me! 🩵

I missed the comment you made about mediums and how they know as much as they do. It is scary in a way. There is a real spiritual world, and a spiritual battle. The Bible warns against fortune tellers and such, and promises that we have angels guarding us. How was your Thanksgiving day? (I ate too much! 🫣 lol)

@Someone99 First, let me say I am so sorry to hear about your father’s passing🫶. However, it’s good to know that you still have hope. My WiFi connection here is not very good-sorry if the messages don’t go through. The fact that we can change the way we end up when we’re older is very reassuring. I think I’m scared I’m going to get old and realize I could die everyday. I have a soccer tournament in front of scouts but I’m like, what’s the point anyways you know what I mean? It’s good to be open to your kids and have good conversations. Sometimes my parents avoid them and think I’m a bit crazy for even thinking this way. I feel a little crazy but, I don’t need the extra commentary😅!!!!! I will always continue to seek God, and continue to seek God’s loving heart. I’ll keep praying too:). I do think the spiritual mediums are overall good people though. Do they automatically go to hell for having that ability? Anyways, my Thanksgiving day was pretty good. I ate a lot of cookies also. Family time was good! This was a long response, but I have one more thing to add if that’s alright. Today, I did live a little in the moment. One thing I couldn’t help was realize that everyone around me would be gone. I will someday go from the kids table to the adult table 😅. I hear everyone talk about their great lives, and can’t help but think, “ well what’s the point anyways?” Trust me. I hate this mindset!!!!! I need to learn, how can I live more in the moment? Sorry for all of this, I hope you understand! Have a good rest of your holiday:)!

@sophielove Also- I was so tempted during the prayer to ask everyone their personal experience with God. I didn’t, but part of me wishes I did. I talked to my Grandpa in the car, and he wasn’t very reassuring:(.

@sophielove I like your replies, especially the long ones. 🙂 I'm glad to hear you experienced some time in the moment today. Hopefully you can experience that more. I imagine your insight and wisdom will give you unique abilities to do amazing things in your life. OCD is causing these thoughts to be crippling RN but we can get through this. We'll try to develop a response tool that can help you be more present. I'm considering my list of tools wondering if one or two may be helpful to you. I would like you to start reading your Bible regularly too, if you don't. :-) (I actually need to read mine more too! 🫣)

@Someone99 Thx!☺️ Yet my OCD brain takes over so much I feel like talent and goals mean nothing! If they will just be forgotten…

@Someone99 https://youtube.com/shorts/Gq3OqzK_xd4?si=CDhssj-M133l5m_M like this video for example with the psychic thing

@sophielove I don't believe they will. I've always heard we live this life to prepare for eternity. Like the qualities we develop here will be used in heaven. Think of professional musicians, like a harp player in an orchestra, maybe that person will play a harp in heaven? We talked about it early in our conversation, that the good qualities, the Bible says faith, hope and love, all remain forever.

@sophielove Can I ask, at the risk of too personal of a question, do you have siblings? Do your parents support and encourage you?

@Someone99 I get that! So we kind of develop our basic skills here and deepen them in heaven. I have one sibling. My parents are pretty supportive, sometimes family life can be a little bit difficult depending on the day. I can’t help but realize I’m going to get old though! Is it as bad as everyone makes it sound!?!?! I would hate to be bad at the things I used to love.

@sophielove It's natural, Sophie. And because it's natural, you'll be ok. Who would want to go through being born? But we were, and we're ok. :-) And as far as the question "what's the point", consider the point being what you can give to others. I mean, why hold the door for the person behind you? I'm realizing as I get older that it's all really about what I can give to others, what I can do for others. Every day we have the opportunity to touch someone's life, sometimes in a small way, usually in a small way. Why not make it a positive way, whatever it may be. Like a smile to a classmate or teacher who may be having the worst day, or picking something up someone drops... Any small thing is a big deal in God's eyes. Maybe that's the point of anything, what can I do for someone else. I thought for over an hour about how to answer this question. I looked at my own life and asked the same. This is why I'm thankful for you, Sophie. You're helping me as well. God bless your night sleep tonight. You're in my heart. 🩷

@Someone99 Thank you so much. I think I’ve realized this too. I feel like the people around me are so shallow these days. Most, don’t really take the time to do something nice. I’ve noticed the more religious people have been the nicest. Maybe they’ve realized this too. I guess it really gets to me that I won’t be able to be as able as I am now, and I always forget about how grateful I am. I have been praying every night. Hopefully that’ll help. Sports is a big one. I’m scared that I’ll be less able as the days pass and soon not be able to play anymore. I’ve made so much friends with this sport and so many memories and I don’t ever want to forget them because they’ve shaped who I am today, do you know what I’m saying a bit? Anyways, again, thank you so much for taking the time to respond to me. I believe that you must’ve come across my post for a reason. YOU are a BLESSING to me! You have no idea! Whenever I have questions I always come on this app and ask you, because I know that you won’t dismiss me. You’ll answer wholeheartedly. That means a lot.

@sophielove I do not know how to upload screen shots, but a person said this on YouTube. They had a good point: https://youtube.com/shorts/gSwt3vvG0zE?si=wTeRrCEALgX66ysh Take a look at the pinned comment.

@sophielove And yeah, God connected you and me through this app. He knew we needed each other in some small way. No accident. 🙂

@sophielove I feel sorry for someone this naive.

@Someone99 :)! Of course! Yeah, this definitely feels like a curse but I guess you’re right. Maybe it is a gift 🙃. Does your niece ever feel sad about not playing anymore? Or, does she realize that she’ll be able to do it in heaven? I’ve considered careers like that, yes. I am not sure what I want to be yet. Nursing is probably not one of them. Medical stuff sometimes grosses me out! 😝

@sophielove Then nursing is definitely not something to consider! I honestly do not know how anyone can be in nursing and deal with all they do, they are amazing people! I'll ask my niece next time about how she feels about not playing. I think in life you find joy and fulfillment in different ways, and maybe more so than we realize until we're actually in that stage of life. That's the "big picture". The question you're seeking is "how do I make it through today". So I'm thinking about response tools, how you might manage the moment by moment challenges you have every day. Like when you're overwhelmed with the thoughts that make you cry. For me, one thing I'd like to do is begin every day praying "God, open my eyes today to opportunities I have to be a blessing to someone, and represent Jesus well". I'm dealing with a lot of anger over a situation that occurred in my previous job that caused me to quit suddenly, just 3 months ago. Thankfully I have a better job now! But OCD is making it difficult to let go. That's one way talking with you has been very helpful to me. I didn't mention that before. :-)

@Someone99 This is really inspiring!!!!! Thank you!😊 Yeah I feel sorry for whoever made that comment too. I definitely wouldn’t mind some mechanisms to help stop my thoughts from taking over. Thank you:)!

@Someone99 I keep seeing these things on YouTube saying nothing matters. So even if I achieved my greatest dreams, even if I went professional in soccer, it wouldn’t matter! That’s crazy.

@Someone99 Like, why should I even try to achieve my goals, if it doesn’t even matter anyways!?!?!

@sophielove Those YouTube videos are not good for you to watch! So, please don't. Start filling your mind and thoughts with positive things. 🙂

@Someone99 Yeah. Still though, why should I even aim for my goals?

@sophielove Ok, here's an OCD response: maybe you should, maybe you shouldn't. But uncertainty doesn't seem to fit here. Here's a negative perspective: what's the alternative, just do nothing? That sounds cold. Here's me talking to the daughter I always wanted (🫣lol): God has a plan and purpose for you and your life. It begins with receiving Jesus as your personal Savior. Jesus said "I am the way, the truth, the life, no one comes to the Father, except through me". Upon receiving Jesus we are restored to God and he gives us the Holy Spirit to guide us. What we hear called the "Holy Trinity" is God, 3 in one, complete. Goals give purpose, meaning, self accomplishment, increases intelligence, wisdom, character, allows you to be a positive influence and mentor young people someday. Why, because of the life inside you. You're unique, no one like you ever existed before or will again. You're the only one who can touch people's lives who are in your life, the way you can. You are the light of the world, as God says to his believers. The world wouldn't be the same without you. 🙂

@sophielove Hope that wasn't too corny of an answer. 🤭

@sophielove Or too much. 🙂 Hope you're having a good day today!

@Someone99 No, that answer was very good!:) I think I understand. Hopefully life doesn’t fly by too quick and I learn to enjoy it. I really hope that there is life after this life.

@sophielove I’m not sure if I asked this yet, but do you believe in those psychic people? I know it’s not good to engage in, but how can some be so accurate in their words?

@Someone99 Okay hear me out on this one: I feel like it would just be easier not to exist? 1. Living here is hard. My accomplishments don’t matter if I live for eternity. 2. If I am in heaven for eternity, things will get boring I don’t like either option. I wish I could just play soccer forever and be happy forever:(.

@sophielove I don't know about psychics and fortune tellers, etc. Me and my son were talking about that yesterday, he brought it up. It's kind of freaky. As I understand God's desire for us to live by faith in him, I wonder if that's why the Bible warns against such things. It's ok to not have answers too.

@sophielove I don't believe things will get boring in heaven. We can't comprehend what it's going to be like, really. Living here is hard, no doubt. There's pain and loss. The risk of loving is the reality of loss. But as I've heard it said before, "it's better love and experience loss, than to never have loved."

@sophielove Something tells me you're hurting in some way, by the thought you have about it being better to not exist. I care about you and if there's something you need to talk about, I'm here for you. Sometimes in OCD the "problem is not the problem". Meaning we're stuck on the surface struggling while there's healing we need deep down inside. I experienced that myself. So... maybe the area your most vulnerable is hurting? Just think about it.

@Someone99 Hello, I went to mass today. They were talking about anxiety actually, resonated with me. I was a little confused, they weren’t really telling us the pages, but I had a few thoughts going through my head: - Why should I believe this is the true religion? - Soccer is something I love, but following my dreams won’t mean very much if I will live for eternity - I am scared I will not be a child forever. - Is God mad at me because I am confused? - What is the point of THIS life? Anyways, what you said about the psychics mediums and fortune tellers is what I’ve heard from many Most claim they gain their powers from God… Is that just Satan deceiving them? Sorry this is a lot!:)

@sophielove I like a lot. :-) Good question about where psychics get their powers from. It's something I don't know much about don't really want to, honestly. I never had a desire to go to one, don't want to, it creeps me out a little bit. Whis I had more wisdom to share on that topic. 🙂 Is God mad at you? God isn't like that. Thankfully, we love in what's called the new covenant age, and the church age. You read through the old testament many times God does things to show his wrath, judgement, righteous anger towards people, nations, etc. I'm so thankful to not be living in those times! Jesus came to establish a new covenant, the church age, age of grace. God's not mad at you, He wants you to draw close to him. 🙂 You won't be a child forever. That doesn't mean you have to become what you see in other grown ups. You're you, wonderful you. 🙂 Why do you think following your dreams is pointless? What else will you do? Are they your dreams, or what others want for you? Does the thought of failure frighten you? (I ask this in love, of course) 🙂 When you ask about "true religion", are you questioning Catholicism? Or Christianity? This is awesome and I love how deep of a thinker you are. I said it many times, you amaze me and impress me and I am honored to know you, Sophie. I love our conversation and our connection here. 🙂

@sophielove Oh, the point of this life, to give to others. Don't love for yourself, you'll be mostly miserable that way. 🙂

@sophielove live for yourself.... Not sure if I'm hitting the o because it's next to the i, or if it's auto correcting. Lol

@sophielove Thinking of you today. I hope your Sunday is ok. 🙂

@sophielove Hey there! Thinking about you, hope you're doing ok. Happy Friday!